Feelings; chapter 1-2
by Selphie Dincht
Summary: Um.............Aeryn confronts anotehr part of her past. Small spoilers for "The Way We Weren't" Read and Review. Now. I command you.


  
This is my first Farscape fanfic, so go easy on me; I don't know how many parts there are going to be, or when I'm going to post all of them. Feedback please! I'm in love with reviews!  
  
Rating; Uh.....PG-13?  
  
Archiving; I have no idea what the hell that is.  
  
Disclaimer; no, I don't own FS or the characters, blah blahblah blah blah, please don't sue me, I'm only 13.  
  
If there's anything else I'm supposed to put, sorry, but I'm not gettign into that. O yeah, it switches between John and Aeryn's POV, starting w/ John.  
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"Zhaan, Aeryn, Rygel, Chiana! Get off your frelling butts and get in the transport pod!" I rubbed my ear gently. D'argo's voice makes my ears ring.  
  
"D'argo, I do not wish to go to such a---a horrid planet, Peacekeepers or no Peacekeepers." Zhaan said flatly. She probably didn't want to go because there was no sun.  
  
"What about the rest of you?!?!?" D'argo was getting mad.....not a happy time for DRD's.  
  
"I'm tired after.....y'know, last night....." Chiana replied, while biting her lip, giving D'argo a playful look.   
  
D'argo cleared his throat and quickly turned away.  
  
"There's probably only items down there that aren't even worth a bucket of dren." Rygel changed the subject, thank God.  
  
Then I decided to break in; "Yeah, ok, it looks like a really crappy planet but you might get lucky and find something really good."   
  
Aeryn had stayed away from the group since the conversation had started.   
  
"What's wrong Aeryn? are you afraid of the big, bad planet?" I regretted that comment immediately.  
  
"John, if you say another frelling word like that again, I'll have your head for it!" I wasn't surprised at that as much as I was of the pain that shot across her eyes and the anger in her voice.  
  
"So then you're coming with us?" I just *had* to say that, another stupid move from John The Inferior. Wait.....she'd called me John. She was hiding something.  
  
The pained look grew in her eyes, but she just said, "If you really think you need me to chaperone so badly, then," she paused to gather herself, "I suppose I'll go."  
  
The thing about Aeryn is, just when I think she's warming up to me, that she'll open up to me and just tell me what's bothering her, she goes back into her "Chrichton is too stupid for me to tell him what the yotz is bothering me" thing. And I really thought for sure this time that she'd tell me anything, after she told me about Velorek. If she would *just* talk to me, I *know*-  
  
"CRIGHTON!!!!!" Everyone, including pilot, was looking at me and yelling my name in unison, snapping me back into reality.  
  
"Woah, sorry, what?" I was completely confused.   
  
"If I'm going down to that *filthy* planet you so desperatly want to go to for supplies that we already have, then we're leaving right now and coming back as *soon* as we get whatever it is you want!" There was the painful look again, and I think I was the only one who noticed that this was hard on her. But *why* was it hard? As soon as I was alone with her, I decided, I was *going* to see what was bothering her if it was the *last* thing I did.  
  
"Chrichton, quit stalling, or I'm going to frelling *drag* you onto the pod!" Something was bothering her, and I was gonna find out what.....  
  
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"AAHH! D'argo, put me down!" Just the sight of John sloped over D'argo's shoulder and shouting at him to be let down made me cheer up a little.....not much, though. John.....when had I started think of him as John? Since I started realizing how I feel?.....No, it would never work, and I didn't think he felt.....AH! I needed to stop thinking like that or I'd go insane! Why should I even consider that, I didn't care about him.....no, that was a lie, but it had to be true! It *had* to!  
  
"Aeryn! Not you, too!" D'argo scolded me. He was already in the pilot seat with Jo.....*Chrichton* in the back.   
  
John smiled at me and patted the seat next to him, "C'mon, sunshine, you can sit next to me!" And I sat.  
  
Maybe with these two I could withstand going to this place. Or at least with John I could.....  
  
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I tried to start a conversation a couple times, but the third time actually caught her attention; "Aeryn, why are you so afraid of this planet?" She gave me a confused look, then tried to get up, but I grabbed her arm and she reluctantly sat back down.   
  
"I'm not, where did you get that idea?" She made a weak attempt at an innocent smile, but it didn't trick me.  
  
"Aeryn, you can't fool me, what's wrong?"  
  
"I-"  
  
"NO! I mean, no, don't act like there's nothing on your mind. There is *something* about that planet and you, and I want to know what it is."  
  
"If you're so sure, then why did you ask me to come? And what makes you think I'd tell you if there was something wrong, which there isn't?"  
  
"Velorek. You told me everything about you and him. I asked you to come because I wanted to talk to you, and since only D'argo came, I figured we could take a walk while he gets what he needs. I asked you to come to this one in particular because it was the nearest planet we can land on."  
  
"Fine, what would you like to talk about?"  
  
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".....and us. You know I'm always here for you." he was about to pull me closer to him when D'argo landed and yelled back to see if we were ok.  
  
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FRELL! Something ALWAYS interupts!  
  
"Sorry about the rough landing!" D'argo yelled back.  
  
Aeryn looked at me with something in her eyes that just said 'leave it alone' and yelled back, "You were just on time, it's fine."  
  
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I ran off the pod as soon as the door opened. I was panicked; the thought that John actually cared about me felt good, but I don't deserve it. I was panicked but over-joyed at the same time. No,no,no,no,no! I needed to stop thinking like that! He didn't know how many painful memories came from that planet, memories even worse then what I did to Velorek, or at least just a bad. John is extremely selfless, a trait that sometimes nearly leads him too his death. But that's the way he is, and it's actually frightening how much he seems to care.....but he would never be interested, not in me, not after he's seen the pain and destruction I've caused in so many lives. But why does he seem to care whether or not *I'm* in pain? All of a sudden, I felt a hand gently rest on my shoulder.....John. When I realized this, I jerked his hand away and turned to him. Let's find what we need, and get back to Moya as soon as we possibly can."  
  
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With that, the radiant miss Sun walked off to the market place. The radiant miss Sun? Aeryn would kill me first chance she got if she heard me say that. But am I really supposed to act like I don't l-"Chrighton, find what you need so we can can leave," D'argo growled. Frell, that happens a lot out here.   
  
"Sorry, just thinking. Let's go." I told him.  
  
But something grabbed my attention in the direction Aeryn was heading.....Something that was following her.....  
**********************************************  
This time the story begins in Aeryn's POV.   
  
Archiving; I'd be grateful if someone would tell me what that is.  
  
Disclaimer; I don't own FS, yada yada yada, please don't sue me, I'm only 13.  
  
Feedback would be appreciated.  
  
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I could just *feel* someone following me. Every time I turned around, though, nothing was there; it didn't help that my eyesight was getting blurry for some reason. I decided to go to a junk shop that I remembered being down an alley near the market place. When I turned to go into the alley,the feeling that someone was following me kept getting stronger and stronger, more and more uncomfortable. I started at a faster pace, hoping that whoever.....*whatever* was stalking me would lose me.  
  
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I couldn't help but think whoever was following Aeryn would only bring pain to her, and I just couldn't let that happen, so I decided to follow them myself. I ran up about 7 metras away from the creature, I realized what it was, and it was even more dangerous then what I thought it might be; 'it' was a Peacekeeper. I stayed very quiet; if he was going to try to hurt Aeryn, then he'd be out of luck. But when Aeryn turned around, she didn't see either of us, I didn't have a clue why.  
  
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When I looked over my shoulder again, I could only see about 3 metras away, and the alley was getting very cold. I tried rubbing my eyes, which made it even worse, but I felt like something bad was going to happen, so I started running.  
  
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I wanted to find out once and for all what was stalking Aeryn. Then I made a very stupid decision; I pushed the PK. See how smart I am? When the guy turned around, he stared murmuring some chant that my translators didn't quite catch. Then he waved his hand in front of my face, and his hand was glowing a strange greyish-blue light that made my eyes hurt. When he took his hand away, everything went black.  
  
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When I got further into the alley, I started feeling, as John would say, 'woozy'. I didn't care about the feeling anymore, I needed to sit down, so I did, very slowly. Then I heard someone run up to me and sit next to me-John. But something didn't feel.....right about him.  
  
"It's been so long since I've seen you", he said in a soft voice.  
  
"John, what are you talking about, I saw you only a few microts ago." I moaned.  
  
"You're as beautiful as I remember you."  
  
"What? Chrichton, stop whatever little game you're playing and help me get back to the transport, I need to rest."  
  
"Then rest you shall get."  
  
I had the strangest feeling that this man wasn't John.....something was wrong. I thought it was silly at the time, but I couldn't think straight, I was getting weak. Then he lifted my face gently up to his and kissed me very softly, and briefly, then said, "Trust me." I didn't, but I didn't have have the strength to stop him either, instead I slipped into a deep sleep.  
  
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I woke up in a room a lot like the Arabian ones you see in movies, kind of like something from 'I Dream of Jeannie'. How I was going to explain that to everyone on Moya, I had no idea.   
  
I blinked my eyes a couple times to adjust them to the light, and then I saw a snake-like woman. She was about 6' tall, slender, had very pale green skin and had a red dress on quite like Zhaan's. She had indigo hair pulled tightly back into a pony-tail braid thingy, and her eyes looked like they belonged to a large cat. The shape of her face was long, skinny and she had and pointed chin and pointy dwarf-ears. She had a slithery but smooth voice, and had a tongue like that of a snake.   
  
"Hey, lady, where am I?" I asked.  
  
"Why, you're in the Pesidential Palace, of course. This is where Faelyn brought you and asked me to watch you."  
  
"What--*watch* me? No thanks, I'm a big boy, I'd rather find my friend-"  
  
"You mean the female? She's fine, Faelyn is keeping her company. Is she your mate?"  
  
"No...but I'd like her tttttttttwait. Who's Faelyn?"  
  
"He's our leader. He has been of great help to our planet."  
  
"You mean it used to look worse?" *that* was hard to believe.  
  
"Oh, after the war, yes. Now, concerning the female-"  
  
"Her name is Aeryn."  
  
"Aeryn. She is not your mate? Good. Faelyn has been looking for a mate who meets his desires for a long time now."  
  
"Whoa, hold on there, what's wrong with him? He's gonna get the yotz beat out of him if he tries to force anything on her, I learned *that* the hard way."  
  
"Oh, you do not understand. Would you like me to explain what happened to you two?"  
  
"Yes, that'd be greatly appreciated."  
  
"Very well. When Fealyn first became our leader, we found that he had some very unusual abilities."  
  
"And those would be.....?"  
  
"He has certain chants for certain things. The one he used on Aeryn goes like-"  
  
"No, I don't want to hear the chant, just which ones were used on Aeryn and I?"  
  
"As you wish. He somehow aquired the ability to make a person feel weaker and weaker, and they temporarily are nearly blind. Then they fall asleep for a few arns. The light you saw was so bright that it made you go unconcious for an arn or two. Then Faelyn could glamour into looking exactly like you, and he could stay that way for an arn. Then he caught up to Aeryn, just *looking* like you, and when she fell asleep, he carried you both back here."  
  
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I moaned at the thought of moving, so instead I opened my eyes. I was in a very colorful room with lots of pillows. Then I saw a tall, handsome man who looked.....awfully.....familiar.....!!!!!"Fealyn?!?!?"  
  
"Aeryn! You're awake! Good."  
  
As he came over to sit by me, I just had to ask, "Where's John??"  
  
"He's safe as long as I want him to be. Not very light, though."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You didn't really think *he* brought you here, did you?"  
  
"But he-that-he.....You were John?!? I *knew* something was wrong! I *knew* it wasn't him! I had a feeling-"  
  
He put his finger to my lips and said, "I'll explain later."  
  
I slapped his hand away and shot back, "Well I want to know *now*."  
  
"Ah, and just as feisty as I remember you, too."  
  
"Feisty? I'll give *you* feisty!" I really didn't like being called 'feisty'. It's disrespectful. So, I leaned foward, intending to strangle him, but he got up and I fell face-first into pillows.   
  
"And just as predictable. Don't bother, Aeryn, you need your rest." And with that, he laid on top of me.  
  
"Get *off* me you frelling bucket of dren!" I screamed; I don't like being forced into anything.  
  
"Oh come on, it'll be-OOF!"  
  
I had pushed him off of me. "I told you to get off."  
  
He got up and looked at me with an evil/playful smile on his face. "There's no running away, Aeryn, your precious John won't be so safe anymore if you don't cooperate, and he can't hear you scream, anyway."  
  
"If your planning to so much as look at me I'll kill you. And if you hurt Crichton, I'll do the same to you, just worse."  
  
"Oh, come on, we could have a lot of fun together!"  
  
"I could never have 'fun' with the man who killed my brother!"  
  
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So what do you think? Read and review! 


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